At the end of 2021, the blog just went through a major migration. Due to the upcoming discontinuation of CODING's static page hosting service, I had to migrate the entire blog to Tencent Cloud's Webify. It took some effort to initialize, and then transferring the CDN took a long time. In addition, updating the SSL certificate also took some time and effort.
Looking back, I have been writing blogs for more than three years. From initially renting a server and setting up WordPress, to renting a virtual host for website building, to migrating back to China and using static pages and image hosting, and finally to the current solution of filing the blog and hosting it on Tencent Cloud, with images and some static resources stored in DogeCloud. From fully self-operated to now focusing on content without worrying about operations, each approach has its pros and cons, but personally, I prefer this method of local editing and continuous deployment to the cloud.
Speaking of which, in this article, I want to look back at the year 2021.
The last time I looked back was two years ago, so when it comes to the question of "how did I spend 2020," my mind only recalls the things that happened since being together with someone and some scattered fragments before that. In a sense, it is both unfortunate and fortunate that I have left behind many random thoughts (I write when I am extremely depressed or deeply touched). I can't help but feel that the problems I face and my own vulnerability are probably similar. I seem to be in a state of being lost or losing myself, wanting to do something that can produce "results" to "prove" myself, or to "enrich" myself temporarily to forget many fearful thoughts.
But after a year, writing still allows me to calm down and temporarily relieve my current anxiety, letting go of other things to recuperate. The process of writing is also a way to organize and "package" my thoughts. It seems that once I write them out, many floating thoughts in my mind will disappear and not disturb me, preventing me from being trapped in a self-conscious struggle and wasting time.
This year has been a year of "big changes" for me. I stepped out of the ivory tower and officially entered society as an employee. In the first half of the year, I worked hard for my graduation, and in the second half of the year, I also worked hard for my own improvement in addition to my job. I gradually figured out many things in the new environment. Compared to many of my other friends, I am lucky. The work pressure is not too great, and there is time for self-improvement. However, although the job is stable, if I don't move forward, there will always be a fear of being eliminated. Only by striving can I realize my self-worth.
After completing my graduation project, I briefly put aside Python and started learning Vue to take on the front-end development work of the department. There have been several training sessions within the team, and I also didn't want to give up on serverless, which I am interested in. I signed up for some technical salon activities, although I missed several of them due to my own reasons. Well, I hope I won't do that anymore from now on.
Secondly, I have been exposed to many new things and started to try things that make myself better. I also welcomed a new family member, a small sea cucumber, just a week ago. It is living very comfortably at home now. In the second half of the year, I started to support myself with my salary and tried to save money to improve my situation and make my life better. At the same time, I started to make some changes to myself, hoping to enrich myself both externally and internally. As time goes by, I increasingly believe that my inner self will gradually influence the external. At least, my laziness has started to make my image less energetic, not at all like an upward person. I hope I can awaken myself again through a more positive and healthy lifestyle and exercise.
When I am disappointed, I often think that this year has been a mess compared to before. I have regressed in some ways this year. I have wasted too much time on random thoughts, and insufficient action cannot break the existing anxiety. Actually, my current job is not the source of my stress, but if I can't balance and adjust many aspects of my life, in the end, time will still be a mess.
If I don't reflect for a long time, the passing of each day seems to lose its meaning. Just like if I don't look at my previous diary, I can't imagine what I was thinking at that time. Even though I am gradually becoming "lazy to express myself," I still can't let myself be confused. Even though there is less and less time for myself, it is much better to seriously think about whether I have made progress every day than to be trapped in games.
For myself in 2022, one word can summarize my biggest expectation: "dynamic reset." Resetting the things that haven't been done every day, resetting the placement of items every day, resetting every small goal, resetting the destination of every item... Rejecting procrastination to the greatest extent is also a good choice.
At the beginning of the year, I sighed that this year might be a very fulfilling year, but a month has passed, and the plans seem to have fallen through again. The things I wanted to persist in every day were put on hold because of the cold weather and my lack of perseverance. In fact, I have many things to do, such as traveling, keeping a love diary, making videos, recording songs, photography, working on my own projects, painting... But in order to achieve my goals, I must make choices. Even if I want to develop myself in multiple ways, I must first solve the basic survival issues. On the one hand, I need to accumulate for my current job, and on the other hand, I need to improve myself to live a better life. I still believe that life will have its brightness.
Actually, things are not that bad now. The goals are small, but the difficulty lies in persistence. By completing small goals one by one, quantitative changes will lead to qualitative changes.